Friday, June 14, 2002

Argh I Was on a Roll

It seemed like I was going to be able to post daily, but then life jumped in the way and demanded it be entertained. So I attempted to entertain it with video games, and it was not satisfied. Then I tried even more videogames, and even that didn't do the trick.

So last night I tried the video game thing one more time, and almost had the trifecta of dissappointment.

First, my work computer died on me, which is the normally the stable one, seeing as an IT department built it, and not my cursed feeble hands. I shut it off the night before a bit forcibly. That is to say, I thought it was hung up in a shutdown operation, so I just manually adjusted the power via the button on the front. Well, long story short, I evidently corrupted one of those "saving your settings" files that it writes to while it's shutting down. Now it won't boot. Ugh.

Then, I installed the WWIIOnline 1.64 patch on my home computer, which is the hotrod of the family. Scratch built by yours truly, it runs like a freaking rocket, and then crashes like one. The crashing probably has a hella lot more to do with the fact that I'm running WinXP Pro edition on it, which is quite possibly the most unstable and buggy piece of OS since Win95. Even with 9M worth of patches downloades straight from Willie's Corp, WWIIOnline still crashed on me. Once was a crash bug (which never happens on the Win2000 work machine), and the other one was when freaking sticky keys came on and bumped me out of the game when I accidentally hit Right Shift five times in a row. Why in god's name is there a god damned shortcut for stickey keys that activates it when I've already gone into the control panel and manually selected it to not be on?!?!

So, enough of the WWIIOnline frustration. My buddy Little John informed me of some new cheat codes you can find at GameFaqs for Jedi Knight 2. Basically, this cheat opens up a developer code that Ravensoft buried in the game. Evidently, they originally intended you to be able to chop people in half, or quarters, or limbless, or headless, or whatever suits you. It would seem that LucasArts thought that was a bit too much, even though it happens in the freaking movies, so they had RavenSoft tone it down.

But the code. Good god the code. I was just wading through hoards of Stormtroopers. Limbs flying. Heads rolling. Bodies everywhere. I'd even take the time to do further pruning on the Stormtroopers who only had their hands lopped off. How unbecoming! Here, let me help you with that unecessary appendage baggage while you writhe in pain. Lop. Off goes your arm. Vrrrmmm. Off goes the other arm. Whoops! That was your head! "It's only a flesh wound!" I was giddy like a kid in a candy store. I think the only way they could have possibly improved on the fun-factor was if they allowed you to pick up body parts using Force Pull/Push and throw them at other bad guys.

Best move ever: throwing the lightsaber and removing heads.

Oh, and Jack? You can make your lightsaber PURPLE. My personal preference is Orange, but hey, not everyone can be perfect ;)

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