Thursday, November 21, 2002

What Would Bo Jackson Do?

So now Christians have teamed up with advertising corporations (or vice versa) in an attempt to get people to stop driving SUVs to save the environment by giving us the ad campaign What Would Jesus Drive.**

Answer: A CAMEL.. Jesus couldn't even speak Latin, let alone drive a car. You think Christ would have a driver's license? He was poor, people. If anything, he'd ride the bus like the rest of the poor people who can't afford even an economy car. I swear, these people don't know Jack. Or Christ. Or Bo Christ. Or whatever.

And let's not even get me started on the whole marketing-merchandise-using-Christ's-name thing again.

Aw screw it. Let's just cut to the chase. First, we had the marketing of popular media with Christ's name for profit, such as the Left Behind books or the Veggie Tales* videos. Then, we got the brazen bumper stickers that ripped off other commercial ventures, such as my favorite: "Got Jesus?" And now, we have advertisements from "environmentally concerned" people who are trying to use Christ's name to get you to park your behemoth SUV at home and drive a smaller vehicle.

I swear to God, you're going to start seeing Jesus endorsing Coca-Cola next.

Just you wait. It's coming.

* Just for the nit-pickers out there such as myself, I'm well aware that the Veggie Tales tapes do not feature Christ or any new testament stories; preferring to avoid possibly blaspheming Christ by turning him into a vegetable by instead focusing on old testament stories. For the record, the vote in my house for the Christ vegetable is Egg Plant.

** I'd give Jack credit for finding this story, but I saw it on a forum board before he posted it. If only I were faster on the trigger!

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