Wednesday, December 04, 2002

Hypothetically Speaking

Hey, smokers*, next time you go to light a cigarette in a building that is an explicit non-smoking building and someone asks you to light the cigarette outside because the smoke from your light pours into their very non-smoking office, don't give them a stupid look and mumble "it's a match" through lips pursed holding your cigarette while holding said match up in the air. Instead, just say, "oh, sorry, I wasn't thinking" and head outside.

Because the guy you're about to get smoke all over doesn't give a rat's ass if your cigarette won't light up outside. It's not his problem. It's yours. So if you want to give yourself some nice lung cookies, then by all means, purchase a god-damned lighter and stop getting even remotely pissy when someone asks you politely not to break laws that you're already well aware of. Unlike you, the non-smoker came to work today to work, not smoke.

Thanks, hypothetically.

* If you're one of those rare polite and considerate smokers (I know you exist somewhere), you can consider yourself excused from this general bias towards "smokers."


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