Keeping Score

A Burger By Any Other Name Would Smell As Sweet

So on the way back from PAX, I felt it would be proper to eat lunch, as most humans are want to do when hunger strikes. My choices in the stranded S concourse at Seatle Tacoma were either to have some Udon noodles or some Burger King. I've come to really hate ethnic food served in a fast-food setting (love ethnic food; hate it when it's mass produced), so of course I decide to try that new Angus burger, and order one up.

Imagine my confusion when what I get is a plain old Whopper. Much to my chagrin, I simply suspected that they had replaced the Whopper with the Angus in name only, and that they were one and the same burger. I have since debunked this with a tiny bit of web surfing, and come to the realization that it was just a common occurance of crappy service.

But upon arriving home, I relayed this erroneous information to my wife, and we had the following conversation:

Me: So did you know that the "Angus" is really just a fucking Whopper?

Liz: What?? Well, you know why they did that, right?

Me: Because "Angus" doesn't sound so much like "This burger will make your ass huge, such as 'Whopper'"

Liz: Exactly.

Me: So what next? Is McDonalds going to return fire by changing the "Big Mac" to "Little Mac?"

Liz: No, "Reasonable Mac."

Me: "Sufficient Mac."